What I’ve Learned About: Baby Sleep

The “What I’ve Learned” series is my personal opinion based on what I’ve learned through my life experiences in various topics. I share, not as an expert, but just as someone who has “live and learned”. Please take what works for you and leave what doesn’t 🙂

One thing that I was majorly not prepared for as a new parent was getting my baby to sleep. Sure I knew I would be “sleep deprived”- but I guess I didn’t realize how incredibly hard it would be to 1. get a baby to sleep without being held and 2. function with virtually no sleep yourself. I remember feeling like a complete failure- like something was wrong with me, or my my baby (or both!)- because he wouldn’t sleep! Not for naps, not at night- not even in the car!

I did what parents do and turned to Google- where I learned all about sleep training, wake windows, sleep cues, etc. Turns out there’s a LOT of info out there- different methods, schedules and SO many different opinions. And while I was grateful to have access to this abundance of information, I was equally overwhelmed. So much so, that I became paralyzed with indecision about what I should do (or shouldn’t do!) to help my baby sleep.

After seriously dozens and dozens of hours researching, I ended up figuring it out….kind of. With every new milestone, mental leap and sleep regression I was back at square one, spending late nights Googling what to do.

Enter baby #2. This time I thought maybe sleeping would come more naturally to him and I would know what to do. But boy, was I wrong! And this time I just didn’t have the mental capacity, time, or energy to spend countless hours researching. I had a two year old to care for too! And for the same reason, it was even more important for me to be rested. I found that with the lack of sleep I was experiencing, I wasn’t the mom I wanted to be to either of my children- I had zero energy to do anything and felt irritable and depressed. Instead of enjoying the fleeting sweet time with my babies, I found myself wishing it away so I could sleep.

I decided to simplify for my own sanity and work with Kristin with Madeleines and Math Facts– a pediatric sleep consultant. I wasn’t sure what exactly to expect- but let me tell you…I wish I had worked with her years ago!

Here is what she did and how working with a pediatric sleep consultant blessed our family:

First, she created a custom, super detailed sleep plan for us based on our family’s needs, preferences and our baby. I loved being able to have a plan customized for us- rather than a one size fits all generic plan. Not only did she give us a plan, but she was available by phone to us for the first week as we implemented the plan- for troubleshooting, tips and encouragement. Just having her there to get feedback, bounce ideas off of, etc was invaluable. I didn’t have to spend hours on Google. I could just quickly ask Kristin any questions I had instead!

With Kristin’s guidance we switched him out of the swaddle and Dock a Tot, into a safe sleep environment. She also helped me make sure his room was ideal for sleeping (I totally thought it was- but turns out it wasn’t!). Additionally, and most importantly, she helped teach him how to fall asleep independently and stay asleep for MUCH longer stretches of time. He went from waking up every 20-30 minutes ALL NIGHT LONG, to sleeping in 4-6 hour stretches at four months old!

Was it great that he was sleeping better? YES! But there were so many other benefits as well:

• I got a happier and much less fussier baby! He seriously seemed like a different baby after getting good sleep- smiley and always content.
• More sleep for me= a much more enjoyable postpartum experience. I am personally someone who can’t function with no sleep. I feel depressed, unmotivated, angry, low on patience, you name it. I became a better mom and wife.
• I had my evenings back which meant more “me time” and more time with my husbands. Before Kristin’s help, I was spending the entire evening in his room trying to get him to go to sleep. It went from several hours to 15 minutes.
• Most importantly- she helped reduce my mental load! It was one MAJOR thing off my plate that I didn’t have to worry or think about- I just had to implement it! This in itself made the whole experience 100% worth it for me.

Hudson is 10 months now and he is still a fantastic sleeper. He takes two 1.5-2 hour naps a day, falls asleep on his own, wakes up happy and sleeps through the night. Like all babies, his sleep fluctuates as he grows and develops but Kristin set us up with great sleep skills and he’s able to adjust in a day or two, rather than several weeks.

Overall, I couldn’t recommend Kristin enough for sleep support for you and your baby. If you had to invest in ONE thing to help you and your baby with sleep- it would be her. Hands down!

Other baby sleep favorites:

Sound machines are a non-negotiable for us. We’ve used these with both boys! I like them because they can be turned up loud (they have to be loud to be effective!) and they are relatively inexpensive as far as sound machines go.

I’m also a huge fan of sleep sacks. I like the fleece Halo sleep sacks because you can use the swaddle version for little babies, but they continue up to toddler size! Henry slept in one until after two years old. It became a comfort item for him which helped him sleep AND it prevented him from ever trying to climb out of his crib- win-win 😉 When he got old enough to unzip it, I turned them around and he wore it backwards for several more months with no issues!

A pitch black room! Did you know that black out curtains often don’t actually make the room dark enough? (Thanks Kristin for that info!) We had TWO sets of blackout curtains on our baby’s window and it STILL wasn’t dark enough! Kristin recommended this blackout film to put directly on the window in addition to the curtains and it was a game changer in making the room dark enough!

Other things that helped my babies sleep:

Having a simple bedtime routine: When I first read about sleep routines I rolled my eyes at some of the 15 step routines I read about. Don’t feel like you need to have this huge elaborate routine in order for it to be effective! Our routine is: diaper, jammies, sleep sack, nurse, rock & hum/sing, bed. After a year I replace nursing with reading 3 books. That is it! It’s worked really well for us with both babies and doesn’t take all night to complete 😉

Learning about wake windows: As I said earlier- this can be super overwhelming (highly recommend hiring Kristin to figure it out for you! 😉 but this has been KEY for getting my babies to sleep. If you don’t follow wake windows, your baby can get overtired, which it turn will make it much more difficult for them to fall asleep!

Books: This probably isn’t sleep consultant approved, but after Henry was 18 months or so, I let him keep a few books in his bed. He would read them until he fell asleep and then again in the morning while he waited for me to come and get him up! He has never once fought bedtime and I really think this is why!

What I ultimately learned about baby sleep:

My general take away is that sleep is IMPORTANT. For you, your partner and your kids. To me, the best investment that you can make is to make sure your kid is a good sleeper because it has such a huge ripple effect into all aspects of life- for years to come. Set up a great sleep environment, a solid bedtime routine, encourage healthy sleep habits and don’t be afraid to ask for help if/when you need it!